I wonder if he wrote this
Letterman's Top 10 Reasons to Vote Democrat:
1. I voted Democrat because I love the fact that I can now marry
whatever I want. I've decided to marry my German Shepherd.
2. I voted Democrat because I believe oil companys' profits of 4% on a
gallon of gas are obscene, but the government taxing the same gallon
of gas at 15% isn't.
3. I voted Democrat because I believe the government will do a better
job of spending the money I earn than I would.
4. I voted Democrat because Freedom of Speech is fine as long as
nobody is offended by it.
5. I voted Democrat because I'm way too irresponsible to own a gun,
and I know that my local police are all I need to protect me from
murderers and thieves.
I am also thankful that we have a 911 service that get police to your
home in order to identify your body after a home invasion.
6. I voted Democrat because I'm not concerned about millions of babies
being aborted so long as we keep all death row inmates alive and
7. I voted Democrat because I think illegal aliens have a right to
free health care, education, and Social Security benefits, and we
should take away the Social Security from those who paid into it.
8. I voted Democrat because I believe that businesses should NOT be
allowed to make profits for themselves.
They need to break even and give the rest away to the government for
redistribution as the Democrats see fit.
9. I voted Democrat because I believe liberal judges need to rewrite
the Constitution every few days to suit some fringe kooks who would
never get their agendas past the voters.
10. I voted Democrat because I think that it's better to pay billions
for their oil, to people who hate us, but not drill our own because it
might upset some endangered beetle, gopher or fish.
P.S. Just in case anybody wonders, I didn't really
America is at that awkward stage. It's too late to work within the system, but too early to shoot the bastards
I can't find any evidence that Letterman tells the truth, so this is bogus.
Life Member National Rifle Association
Life Member Illinois State Rifle Association
Member Parents of Murdered Children
The reason that we argue is not to be right, but to come closer to the truth.